[Being alone is freedom. The part of his mind still grasping at his attempt to join the collective instantly snatches it up as a bludgeon against the rest of him.
He's holding him back. He's nothing but a burden.]
They should have taken me...
[It's small, hardly audible, before he sucks in a deep, wet breath, and forces himself to focus on everything Beckett has said and done to contradict that idea, to show appreciation for their friendship. Even - no, especially - that ill-fated experiment. It had saved his life in the end, after all.]
...No. I'm sorry, I- I shouldn't have said that. What did they find? Knowing what we do now, about the cult, it-...I doubt it could have been anything good, for them, for us, for the lingering spirits in the collective.
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Date: 2018-04-08 03:23 am (UTC)He's holding him back. He's nothing but a burden.]
They should have taken me...
[It's small, hardly audible, before he sucks in a deep, wet breath, and forces himself to focus on everything Beckett has said and done to contradict that idea, to show appreciation for their friendship. Even - no, especially - that ill-fated experiment. It had saved his life in the end, after all.]
...No. I'm sorry, I- I shouldn't have said that. What did they find? Knowing what we do now, about the cult, it-...I doubt it could have been anything good, for them, for us, for the lingering spirits in the collective.