Enoch's own expression relaxes at the sight of Beckett's uneven grin.
"I hope you'll like it all the more on hearing it."
He pauses a moment, wondering where to begin. The insight spanned a couple of different threads of memory. He supposes the most striking contrast would be against the man he was when he believed Clayton had never died. The man clinging to regained mortality, the one who had - in their reality - told Beckett after they had teamed up against Jack that immortality had not been a good life for him.
"You- you may recall I had forgotten Clayton died." The first clue is in the minimal hesitation on this mention of this pivotal loss. A weight that is no longer there. "He was like a brother to me, the first man I'd called 'brother' in centuries. It had always seemed too mortal for me, claiming another to belong to my generation. What use did I have for it when I was the only one?
"When I learned my aging had resumed here, I- I thought it could be an opportunity to reclaim something I'd lost. I thought I could find comfort in mortality. But the truth is that I only thought I wanted it. Immortality had been unkind to me, yes, but...it's who I am. And you-"
He can't keep himself from approaching to lay a hand on Beckett's shoulder, and there's a definite sense of something not followed through in the energy left over as his fingers close in a firm grip, a sense of hovering over a decision. Saying it now, giving it voice, he wants to hug him, but he also needs to look him in the eyes, needs all of the sincerity that comes of that.
"You gave me a reason to accept it. To love it as a part of myself. I had to come thank you for-...for being the reason I look forward to forever."
action;
"I hope you'll like it all the more on hearing it."
He pauses a moment, wondering where to begin. The insight spanned a couple of different threads of memory. He supposes the most striking contrast would be against the man he was when he believed Clayton had never died. The man clinging to regained mortality, the one who had - in their reality - told Beckett after they had teamed up against Jack that immortality had not been a good life for him.
"You- you may recall I had forgotten Clayton died." The first clue is in the minimal hesitation on this mention of this pivotal loss. A weight that is no longer there. "He was like a brother to me, the first man I'd called 'brother' in centuries. It had always seemed too mortal for me, claiming another to belong to my generation. What use did I have for it when I was the only one?
"When I learned my aging had resumed here, I- I thought it could be an opportunity to reclaim something I'd lost. I thought I could find comfort in mortality. But the truth is that I only thought I wanted it. Immortality had been unkind to me, yes, but...it's who I am. And you-"
He can't keep himself from approaching to lay a hand on Beckett's shoulder, and there's a definite sense of something not followed through in the energy left over as his fingers close in a firm grip, a sense of hovering over a decision. Saying it now, giving it voice, he wants to hug him, but he also needs to look him in the eyes, needs all of the sincerity that comes of that.
"You gave me a reason to accept it. To love it as a part of myself. I had to come thank you for-...for being the reason I look forward to forever."